I recently turned 35. Yay me! I am so grateful to be alive but inevitably, I got to thinking about my life. I think in many ways that age represents a sort of watershed moment and so I suspect that I am not the only single Christian woman who feels the need to examine her life when she arrives upon this milestone.
Do you realise we are inherently ungrateful? That I think is a key contributor to our being unhappy or feeling like failures in many cases. I don’t know about you, but I find myself grumbling (to myself) from time to time about the things I do not have in my life. On some occasions, it is that I do not have a husband; on others, it is that my friends are far away or have their own families and so I have no one to hang out with on a weekend. Sounds familiar?
During the Christmas season, there are tons of Christmas romance movies on television. I don’t know; I guess people are more likely to find a significant other during this season of peace on earth and goodwill? Anyway, I was watching this Christmas romance earlier and by the end of it I started feeling a bit self-conscious and perhaps slightly depressed. It just seemed that I was being left out of all this magical encounter and romance stuff, and for a while that bothered me.
I have found myself from time to time falling into the habit of comparing myself to other Christian women. I will, for example, recall a Christian woman I know, who did not have the cleanest record in the sex department. Usually, it’s some person who has probably had several relationships involving sex, even while identifying as a born-again Christian. In the meantime, I was busy saving myself for marriage.
So I have always said my blog would focus primarily on how to live an abundant life even while single, and it has. Today, however, I want to touch on a topic that is on the minds of most women, including myself, at some point: finding a husband. While I am not particularly obsessed with this idea, the truth is, I would love to be married one day. The companionship and commitment are something I desire.
Two weeks ago I spoke about having crazy faith. I really feel more and more that I am being called upon to exercise just that. I am thinking of making some changes in my life right now, career-wise, but it’s hard. It’s hard because it would require getting out of my comfort zone, essentially getting rid of my safety net, and jumping!