The Invisible God

Dear Sister in Christ,

Do you ever have doubts about God? Have you ever doubted whether He really is who people say He is?  Or perhaps you have doubts about His very existence or his faithfulness. It’s hard when after several years of being a Christian, when you thought you had it all together, and you were beyond the stage of needing spiritual milk, you end up questioning the very foundation of what you believe in.

It’s not a topic Christians talk about a lot. We like to maintain the image that we are “grounded firm and deep”, that nothing can shake our faith. After all, if we as Christians doubt, then who will show sinners the way?

The truth is, Christians, those who are new to the faith, those who have been born again since adolescence, and those in between, have doubts about God’s existence and/or faithfulness from time to time. I’ve come to believe that it is not a sin to have doubts. In fact, it might just be a part of the growing experience. Personally, I have had moments when I have doubted the existence of a God who is invisible, and who never seems to show up in really tangible ways. It’s how my mind works. I am rational. I like logic.  Things need to make sense. Sometimes, I have doubted just how big a role God plays in our lives, in whether we live or die, in our successes, in whether we starve or are fed, etc. Sometimes I wonder whether I really know God at all.

And then he reminds me: through His word, through the grandeur of nature, through a simple act that could be mistaken for coincidence, through extremely “good fortune”, and through the child-like faith of other Christians around me. He reminds me that He is not a “logical” God. He is beyond logic. He has no inclination to appear in person for me to touch Him. He doesn’t give me what I want, but rather what I need. He doesn’t fit into the metaphysical boxes human beings have created. What He demands is faith, child-like faith, faith that cannot be rationalised and explained logically. Anybody can believe in a God they can see, touch and hear. Christians are called to be exceptional. We are a different breed. I didn’t realise just how different we were expected to be.

In these moments of doubt, validation is often found through fellowship with fervent believers, and in His Word; somehow the answers always seem to be there. It’s funny too, ironic really, for these very doubts often lead me to a better understanding of God, and a strengthening of my faith.

Do you ever have doubts about Him?

Love,

Daughter of a King

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